Getting practical: Make some space!

Ok so since last week’s newsletter was about letting go (read it here if you missed out), it’s only natural that this week we talk about what we’re going to do with all that space we made from letting go of things that no longer serve us right? Out with the old, in with the new as they say…

Wrong.

Because Melanie, you talked about how letting go is so dang hard remember?

Right, right.

Ok so, what if letting go and making space go hand in hand?

Plus, if I may, what if there’s a difference between letting go of something that is really hard to let og of (like a person or a job) vs. a habit you just can’t seem to kick, and you would really like to finally let go of it?

So fine, since last week’s newsletter was about letting go, this week let’s talk about the kind of letting go that leaves you with more space,

cool?

Cool.

Why exactly am I so nitty gritty about this?

Glad you asked.

1. There is so much talk around letting go (especially in the fall, go figure) that I want to address it, but not just chuck it in a bucket and be done with it. It’s not easy as we've established and nuance matters.

2. I kept thinking about it this week and found that there are two ways of letting go and they are very different. One is slow and gentle and you really can’t rush it and the other, well, can be optimized…

…so let’s get into it.

Last week’s NL was mainly about the gentle, soft way of letting go - ya know, the thing we still get annoyed about, that is still etched in our minds like the car key scratch in our ex's Tesla, but we just can’t rush them even though we'd love to get it done before our 3pm appointment. But bad news boo, you’re out of luck. Life doesn’t work that way (again, I tried).

Yes, you can rewire your body for safety by being open and receptive (and if that is something you’re called to do, I am here for it) but today...

*drum roll*

let’s get a bit more practical, shall we?

Disclaimer, not saying it will be easier… it won’t.

Is there something in your life that you would like to let go that doesn’t feel so heavy and hard to do?

Something that just takes up too much room?

 A habit?

 Behavior?

 Device? *cough cough*

Well to find out, do the following exercise (mentally right now or throughout your day(s) this week).

• As you go about your day and move from action to action, take a moment to pause and ask yourself: how did this action I just did make me feel? Energized or drained?

• Write it down.

• Repeat for different actions (ideally the reoccuring ones every day but anything you notice is good)

• Be mindful and notice even the little in-between actions (tapping your phone, overthinking spiral, responding to emails immediately, task switching… etc).

• If you want you can even rate how energizing or draining each task was on a scale from 1-10 (1 being very draining).

At the end of (at least one) day of doing this, go over your notes and identify the things that feel more draining than energizing (or have the lowest scores).

In a next phase, ask yourself: What can you do to minimize the actions that drain you?

Let’s get personal...

I have noticed, much more strongly than other times, how much energy I lose by being on social media. I can feel it in my ability to focus, be present and overall health if I’m honest… now if that is not an energy drain I don’t know what is.

Ok, so I know I promised this was going to be practical and it is, but let me squeeze in this teeny tiny in between step:

• When you think about the actions that drain you, take a couple deep breaths and feel into your body as if you were doing that action.

• What comes up for you?

• Since you already labeled it as draining, what are the other negative feelings that you associate with it?

Write them down.

For me it’s these: nervous, frustrated, lost, anxious, annoyed at myself… the list goes on.

And you know what?

I really don’t want to feel that way due to an action that I am doing…

I REALLY want to change that.

What I do really want is to feel in control of my own time, my own life and what I do with it!!

So here’s the kicker…I need to be honest about it.

Cause often we’re like, nah of course I don’t want to feel like sh*t but then we go on to do the things that make us feel like sh*t…

You feel called out?

Good.

(That’s my job.)

(And also, I am you.)

So let me ask you again:

What can you do to minimize the actions that drain you?

The answer to that, my friend, is different for everyone..the good news is, you already have it, you just have to find it.

No mountain too high, challenge (or iPhone) too tough to crack, all you need is the right tools (well and maybe for the iPhone thing also the FBI, but that's really not the point).

Learning to let go of things (big or small) to reclaim what truly matters is exactly the type of work I get to do with my clients, so if you’d like a helping hand, book a discovery call HERE.

I wish you a fully energized and wonderful week!

Love,

Mel

🤍

Ps. All my newsletters are written by me, not AI (so please flag the typos). 😉